Creamy Ham Rolls, 1972

Oh creamy ham rolls (stuffed with processed American cheese, frozen onions in cream sauce and 1 envelope of white sauce mix), I didn't know you could be so...sexy. So very sexy.

Photo from: Better Homes and Garden Fondue and Tabletop Cooking, 1972

Fried Chicken with Puffs and Gravy, 1979

What kind of debauchery is this? The gravy on the fried chicken and the frosting on the cake look so interchangeable, it's like the unspoken rules of social decorum, civility and decency don't apply. It's the end of polite society as we know it. I believe it was this type of avrice that led to the fall of Rome.

From: Woman's Day Encyclopedia of Cookery, Volume 1, 1979

Dunkers, 1967

Processed cheeses and monosodium glutamate abound in these New Years Eve dip recipes from 1967. For those hostesses that are feeling daring, the cookbook recommends experimenting with "foreign flavors", such as the recipe for "Rio Grande Dip", which calls for a 1 pound can of strained pork and beans mixed with processed American cheese and chili powder. Your digestive track will find it foreign, for sure.

From: Better Homes and Gardens Holiday Cookbook, 1967

Salami Bells on Cheese Squares, 1967

Oh oh; looks like these salami bells caught a case of the parsleys. This dish perfectly illustrates what can happen when a garnish goes too far. A gross misuse of parsley, indeed.

From: Family Circle Illustrated Library of Cooking, 1967

Ham Pancake Shortcakes, 1972

Breakfast takes a tragic turn with this recipe from 1972. The recipe for the stuff between the pancakes calls for a can of spam, some frozen green beans, and an "envelope of a la king sauce mix". Slap a canned peach on top and you're in business.

From: "The Illustrated Library of Family Circle Cooking", 1972

Baked Salmon Mousse with Poulette Sauce, 1972

This is like some crazy archaic precursor to Molecular Gastronomy. I can't decide whether this dish looks totally outdated or super space-age and futuristic.

From: Family Circle Illustrated Library of Cooking, 1972

Easy Perfection Salad, 1967

In this "salad", pimento detritus and canned sauerkraut are magically suspended in lemon jello. This is very reminiscent of a swarm of mosquitos I once saw trapped in amber.

From: Better Homes and Gardens Jiffy Cooking, 1967